A Red Neck Christmas Tree Story

If These Heels Could Talk they would say, "there will be no expense spared when looking for the perfect Christmas tree."

On Sunday my three kids and I ventured out to find the perfect tree.  We muddled our way through multiple trees looking for full limbs, the prettiest green  and just the right height.  Every tree we came to we inspected thoroughly and each one of us had our reasoning for why that tree was not the perfect tree. 

Finally after inspecting several trees we reached the tree that we all could agree upon. My oldest son cut it down and then we stuffed into the back of my BMW.  Yes I know that is redneck at it's finest.   The truck is being repaired and so we improvised.  We didn't have string to tie it to the top so we did the next best thing and let it hang out the back window.  I posted a picture on Facebook to share with my FB friends.  And in return I received this awesome story about my mom and dad and one of their Christmas tree adventures.


you see what had happened was....

My mother had seen and picked out "the perfect tree."  So my dad called one of my uncles to take a ride with him to assist in the fetching of this tree.  When my uncle hopped into the car he was quickly briefed on the situation at hand.  Apparently the location of this "perfect tree" was on some private property.  My uncle quickly replied, "I don't know much about stealing a Christmas tree."

They scurried on to the spot via my mother driving the get away car and my dad and uncle quickly exited the vehicle, like two bandits in the night.  As they were making their way over some barbed wire fence (that should have been the first clue that this was a bad idea)  they dropped the most important tool; the much needed saw.  It took them a few minutes to locate it in the dark but once they found it they set out in the direction of the "perfect tree." 

Now if anyone knows my mother they know that at moments she can be a little on the nervous Nellie side and so it should be no surprise that she came back only a few minutes later honking the horn.  My dad quickly yelled at her, "get on outta here!" So she high tailed it away from the scene while my dad and uncle continued to work on getting the "perfect tree." 

Finally they arrive at their destination and my dad instructs my uncle to hold the tree while he cuts it down.  My dad proceeds to saw the tree down and when he has accomplished his mission my uncle lets go and the  "perfect tree" falls into three pieces and was the ugliest thing you had laid your eyes on. 

Apparently the "perfect tree" was three trees that had grew together but to the common person appeared as one "perfect tree."  My dad and uncle made their way back to the road and my mom where my mother was waiting in the get away car and she quickly asks, "where the hell's my tree!?" and my  dad yelled, "the damn things out there in three pieces!" and my uncle replied, " I guess that's what we get for trying to steal a tree."


All that glitters isn't gold.......