Today as I was moseying my way home after a long day at the office, I had a revelation.
My commute is about a forty minute drive. Some people cringe at that thought and although at times it can seem a little lengthy for me, I take that forty minutes to reflect on life and all the mysteries that are surrounding us and to take a selfie or two.
In that forty minutes I will either turn the music up loud or turn the music off, it really all depends on my mood and where I want my mind to go. Today, the music was up loud. As I channel surfed looking for one pick me up song after another, my station landed on a rap station. Now I like most any kind of music and I love artistic, creative individuals and every genre of music has it's good and bad songs, but today it seemed like every song on the rap station was bad.
Here is why I thought they weren't that great....... the people kept repeating the same thing over and over and over and over and over and over and over again..... Not only did they do that but the words seemed to lack meaning and depth.... and they seemed superficial..... Each song either talked about a load of money, getting some arse, or bitches be balling. What the hell does that even mean?
I like the beat to these songs more than I do the words. Those words that are repeated over and over again about slapping someones arse, getting high in the club or making it rain on all these hoes are so useless. I know there are some rap songs that have meaningful lyrics behind them and I welcome them. The others not so much.
So that got me to thinking about a poem that I wrote my high school year. My teacher graded it with an A+++ and wrote at the bottom to "put this in a bible to keep and treasure." I didn't understand why at the time and not that my words are so much more meaningful than the next person, but it did seem to touch her in some sort of way. . At the age of 18 I was still trying to figure out life and what direction I wanted to head, at the age of 38 I am still trying to figure out a few things, except this time I know what direction I want to head. I might even become a rap artist.
Here are the words that I wrote over twenty years ago and not realizing how true they would be still to this day.
I do not see myself as an exact replica of my parents. However, I do contain certain characteristics that I obtained from them through the process of life: their eyes, nose, hair, and maybe even their smile. I even resemble my brothers a little. But no matter how much my physical characteristics may resemble them, my inner soul is different. I possess characteristics that set me aside from everyone else. I am:
The learner of many lessons
The confessor of many confessions
A mourner for the lost
The money for every cost
The loner of countless days
A person with numerous ways
The light of many paths
The laughter of many laughs
The tears of my friends
The sinner of many sins
A witness of love
The wing of a white dove
The victim of pain
A accumulator of gain
The lover of life
A fighter of my strife
A carrier of burdens
The mender of many ends
A traveler of today's journeys
A worrier of many worries
A forgiver of many souls
An obtainer of my goals
The sunlight of the sunrise
The clouds of the skies
The dawn of the daybreaks
The maker of yesterday's mistakes
The words of every song
The child wanting to belong
The dreamer of many dreams
A mender of my seams
The heart of my people
The waves upon the sea
A believer of many lies
The shouts of many cries
A reminder of the past
The love wanting to last
But most of all I am a gift from above
Sent down with lots of love.
I am not just a shadow of my peers; I am myself. I am only an example of something created through the wonders of love. I am a speck of hope and wisdom of generations to come. I am free!!!!
I was proud of that A+++ then and I am proud of it now.
