Memories Can Be A Blessing or a Curse

If These Heels Could Talk they would say, "Memories can be a blessing or a curse."

 

I had a wonderful friend that was taken from this Earth way to soon.   I remember the first time I ever saw Jennifer. It was 6th grade. She was beautiful. She had long strawberry blond hair, it was pulled up with a clip and was covered in long curls.  She had the bluest eyes you have ever seen on a person. Perfect can't even begin to describe her beauty. 

 

 I ...on the other hand was freckled face with a haircut that even a boy would cringe at having. (I may post pictures to prove). I was in awe of her. We immediately became friends. Over the course of our school years we became closer and closer. I don't ever remember her and me ever having the typical girl fallout. We just did what friends do.

 

Thanks to Jennifer I got my first heart break. Well not really her fault the boy was an A double S hole, but she did date is brother and encouraged me very persuasively to date the guy. Anyway, I wasn’t mad at all at her, he was the jerk. 

 

One memory that sticks out for me is from the 8th grade. My family and I were going to West Point Lake camping for a week. Jennifer wanted to go, I believe not so much for the camping experience but because she had an eye on my cousin. I tried to prepare her up front to the ways of how the Garner's camp. When we went camping we went camping; tents, no running water, week at a time, bathe in the lake kind of stuff. 

 

 As we were driving to the lake, Jennifer is rummaging through her bag and I notice that she has a curling iron and a hair dryer. “Hmmmm, Jennifer we ain’t staying at the Holiday Inn darling, there is no electricity.” She was mortified. But we had the time of our life. I chipped my tooth on a beer bottle, thanks to my cousin Jamie a.k.a mudcat. And I still haven’t got it fixed. Maybe when I do I will send him the bill. We got in trouble by the park ranger for being rowdy teenagers (there was only about 15 of us running ramped through the park). 

 

 I had to go to the well nearly every day and pump the water so she could wash her locks. Jennifer was 14 and looked to be 21, here I was flat chested and she is looking like a Victoria’s Secret model. But she never made me feel less than what I was. She embraced our family and our craziness and rolled right along with us. We swam, we ate watermelon, we stole our parents beer, (we didn’t smoke so be proud of that), we fished; we did what teenagers are supposed to do. These memories are definitely a blessing. I would share more, but some things I must keep to myself.

A Red Neck Christmas Tree Story

If These Heels Could Talk they would say, "there will be no expense spared when looking for the perfect Christmas tree."

On Sunday my three kids and I ventured out to find the perfect tree.  We muddled our way through multiple trees looking for full limbs, the prettiest green  and just the right height.  Every tree we came to we inspected thoroughly and each one of us had our reasoning for why that tree was not the perfect tree. 

Finally after inspecting several trees we reached the tree that we all could agree upon. My oldest son cut it down and then we stuffed into the back of my BMW.  Yes I know that is redneck at it's finest.   The truck is being repaired and so we improvised.  We didn't have string to tie it to the top so we did the next best thing and let it hang out the back window.  I posted a picture on Facebook to share with my FB friends.  And in return I received this awesome story about my mom and dad and one of their Christmas tree adventures.


you see what had happened was....

My mother had seen and picked out "the perfect tree."  So my dad called one of my uncles to take a ride with him to assist in the fetching of this tree.  When my uncle hopped into the car he was quickly briefed on the situation at hand.  Apparently the location of this "perfect tree" was on some private property.  My uncle quickly replied, "I don't know much about stealing a Christmas tree."

They scurried on to the spot via my mother driving the get away car and my dad and uncle quickly exited the vehicle, like two bandits in the night.  As they were making their way over some barbed wire fence (that should have been the first clue that this was a bad idea)  they dropped the most important tool; the much needed saw.  It took them a few minutes to locate it in the dark but once they found it they set out in the direction of the "perfect tree." 

Now if anyone knows my mother they know that at moments she can be a little on the nervous Nellie side and so it should be no surprise that she came back only a few minutes later honking the horn.  My dad quickly yelled at her, "get on outta here!" So she high tailed it away from the scene while my dad and uncle continued to work on getting the "perfect tree." 

Finally they arrive at their destination and my dad instructs my uncle to hold the tree while he cuts it down.  My dad proceeds to saw the tree down and when he has accomplished his mission my uncle lets go and the  "perfect tree" falls into three pieces and was the ugliest thing you had laid your eyes on. 

Apparently the "perfect tree" was three trees that had grew together but to the common person appeared as one "perfect tree."  My dad and uncle made their way back to the road and my mom where my mother was waiting in the get away car and she quickly asks, "where the hell's my tree!?" and my  dad yelled, "the damn things out there in three pieces!" and my uncle replied, " I guess that's what we get for trying to steal a tree."


All that glitters isn't gold.......

Home Is Really Where the Heart Is

If These Heels Could Talk they would say, "home really is where the heart is."

I am going to share something that some may not believe and then again some may can relate.  There is not one single house/trailer/dwelling that I CAN REMEMBER  living in that is still present.  In other words all of the places that I grew up in and can still remember are gone. They were torn down, pushed over and demolished. 

The interesting thing about this is although the structures are not there I can close my eyes and be right back in those places.  Each one of them were so much more than walls, floors, bolts, joists, paneling, tile, carpet, etc........ They were home but they were home because of the memories that were made there. 

One in particular housed a lot of memories.  I have written about it in some of my other stories.  It was a single wide trailer that sat on cinder blocks.  It was two bedrooms and one bath.  I shared a room with my two brothers. The room was just big enough to hold their set of bunk beds, my twin bed and a four drawer dresser.  It had two front doors but one of them we considered a back door because it was at the back of the trailer.  When my brothers would start to tussel my mom would panic and start yelling, "stop it before you turn the trailer over."  I was always freaked out about that. Mainly because we had no real "septic" tank just a pipe that my dad referred to as the "poop" pipe that ran several feet out the back into the woods. There is probably oil there now. 

There was no grass around this home just Georgia red clay.  We never had to worry about cutting grass because there was none to be cut.  There was a washing machine broken down that sat out side the back door and then there was a broken down refrigerator that sat outside the front door.  Sometimes you could find a "plant" or two growing on that refrigerator.  This home sat only a few hundred feet from the Flint River. 

The bathroom was well adorned with a few holes from the shot out plumbing that we had.  But my mother always made sure that the holes were covered with the prettiest Kmart throw rug.  We knew to straddle the holes in order to prevent injury.  The door to the bathroom was off the hinges however if you wanted any privacy while doing the do you just leaned it up against the wall.  Let's face it there was no privacy because well it was a single wide trailer. 

My dad paid $500.00 for that trailer and pulled it there with a tractor.  So that right there tells you the quality and value of the structure itself, however the memories are priceless.

This is where I lived the day my dad got caught running moonshine.  Talk about embarrassing.  I was in the sixth grade and it wasn't bad enough that my brothers and I were called Swamp Rats already, now throw that in the mixture and we were true Swamp Rats. 

This is where I lived when I found out there was no Santa Claus. 
This is where I lived when my heart broke for the first time because of a stupid boy. 
This is where I lived when my grandmother passed away.
This is where I lived when I learned how to swim. This is where I lived when I learned that sometimes a friend to your face is not a friend behind your back.
This is where I lived when I also learned that a true friend doesn't care what you live in they like you for who you are and not what you have. 
This is where me and my brother drove barbies in a truck around the tree out front.
This is where I lived when I learned how to fry fish all the while standing in a chair. 
I watched my mom cry here and I watched my mom laugh here. 
I witnessed many family gatherings under that same tree out front and watched my dad work on an engine there. 

The memories go on and on..... they are never ending some are good and some are bad..... nevertheless they are there and they are valuable yet priceless. I can't wait to share some of the stories with my grandchildren one day. 

I Was Redneck When Redneck Wasn't Cool

If These Heels Could Talk they would say, "my family was rednecking it long before Duck Dynasty came along and they continue in their redneck ways."

A funeral doesn't stop the show.

- If you excuse yourself from the funeral procession that is on the way to the grave site to make a pit stop at the store for a case of beer in hopes of making it back in the procession without being missed, you just might be a redneck.  

 - If you excuse yourself from the graveside service because nature is calling and you head to the trees to relieve yourself only to be seen coming out of the woods zipping up, you just might be a redneck.   

       My 38 year old cousin  passed away unexpectedly earlier this year.   He had suffered many ailments throughout his life and was not in the best health; however his death was a surprise to many. It was especially surprising to those who were the closest to him; his two beautiful sisters, his mother and father as well as the rest of his extended family; cousins, aunts and uncles.  

 

       When I paid my respects that Friday evening, his sisters were speaking with the Pastor about some of the many memories that they shared with their brother....... For a brief moment you could see a little twinkle in their tear stained eyes and a smile brighten up their faces. Of course in true Angie fashion I had to put my two cents worth in and we all started talking about “when we were kids.” We talked about how our awesome Granny would cook EVERY weekend, Saturday and Sunday for the entire family. On any given Saturday or Sunday there could be at least 30 or more people at her house (single wide trailer with no central heat or air and no dishwasher) She would cook chicken, fresh beans or peas, mashed potatoes, macaroni and cheese, soup, biscuits, cornbread, corn on the cob, pot roast, meat loaf, collard greens or turnip greens or both, and the list goes on and on. Needless to say her cooking would put any buffet to shame. Everything was ALWAYS homemade and most of the time from Papas garden. Don’t even get me started on her homemade desserts.

         It was during these gatherings that the small army of cousins could most of the time be found getting into some sort of mischief. We would walk to the river, go fishing or swimming or both, try to walk on a frozen beaver ponds, play endless hours of softball in our dirt yards (we really didn't have that much grass), pretend to make moonshine, play hide and go seek, jump out of poison ivy drenched trees into the river, play with turtle eggs (yes turtle eggs, they bounce), cuss, steal beer out of unsuspecting parent's coolers, cuss some more, argue and fight, but most of all, love, laugh and make memories. We made memories not realizing that 20 or more years later we would be sharing them because one of our own would be gone. Thank God for those memories.

       Now you are probably wondering what all of this has to do with how this story began, with the redneck jokes. Well I shall enlighten you all. My family that would be mainly my mom and brothers think I put EVERYTHING on Facebook. Well that is simply not true. There are tons of stories I could share, however as with everything else in life, it is all about the timing. And God has a funny sense of timing..... I unfortunately could not attend the service on Saturday due to a prior commitment that  could not be broken  that I actually had forgotten all about…. However I was quickly told about the day and as with most Garner gatherings, there was some sort of shenanigan occurring, not even a funeral can stop them.

             My cousin sent me a message  to tell me that even through their tears, they have found laughter and it was because of another cousin and an uncle that they have been able to find that laughter. (I am omitting the names only because I didn’t ask them for permission and I know I could ask for forgiveness later, just trying to do the right thing just this one time though, don’t get used to it people)

             Apparently as the funeral service was wrapping up one of the cousins found it a prime opportunity to head out in front of everyone to make a stop at the store for a little fuel and a drinky drink. The problem is they just weren’t fast enough. As he is making is exit from the store with a case of beer, there goes my cousin in  his final ride to his resting place along with the rest of the family. Then as the family is gathered at the grave side paying their last respects one of the uncles is spotted coming out of the woods after a quick trip to relieve himself, his bladder just could not wait a minute longer.

 

          Now there are some people that would think, how redneck and I can’t say that I would not disagree. But it’s that kind of redneck that my cousin  lived and loved. After all, he was a simple man. His sister said, "this is exactly as he would have wanted it and it was the perfect way to send him off."   She went on to say that her sister wanted to share this story for the world to know about  the family that they love so dearly. And since I love telling stories, I volunteered to help her with the story.

           In my lifetime, I have found laughter in some of the most painful situations. The laughter to me was truly the medicine that I needed. And the laughter that my cousins, his sister  have found is just how their brother wanted it and is what they needed. They have laughed until they cried which is much better than crying until you laugh. As the weeks go by, they will not miss their dear brother any less, they will however be able to look back and reflect on his final days and know that even in his death memories were made

I Am Really Thankful For This Stuff

If These Heels Could Talk they would say, "I kind of slacked on a few days of the thirty days of thankfulness so I am going to sum up a few things I am really thankful for."

During the thirty days of thankfulness people posted mostly the obvious things that they were thankful for; family, friends, jobs, food and a roof over their head.  I too am thankful for those things but I thought I would let you in on a few things that I know I have at times taken for granted until I didn't have them. 

1. Central Heat and Air -  If you have never went without central heat and air then you can't appreciate this, however I have been without both and there is nothing like CENTRAL HEAT AND AIR.  My grandmother was the mass collector of them sticky fly traps.  You could walk into her single wide trailer on any given 100 degree summer day and see at least twenty of them things hanging around.  Even with central air she may have had a few flies enter her home, but not enough for twenty sticky fly traps hanging from the ceiling.

We had a wood burning stove or a kerosene heater most of the times for our heat at my houses.  There is nothing worse than heating the front half of your body to a good toasty level only to have the back half of you frozen solid.  You just have to keep turning and turning like you are a piece of fish being fried  until you get a good toasty feeling on both sides and then by that time the wood has burned down and you have to go outside to get more.  I've never really had that problem since central heat and air....  I am blessed.

2. Dental Floss -  How can anyone go without flossing?  I seriously think I could compare it to crack for me, although I have never tried crack. Hence if I had I probably wouldn't care about the flossing.  I have to floss at least three times a day.  And I am thankful for those little pickers that have the floss on the end.  HEAVEN in my mouth I tell ya. 

3. Make-Up -  Yes I know not everyone wears makeup and not every woman needs it, I however love putting on my make-up.  I do not feel complete without my make-up.  It is just another accessory for me and I rarely leave the house without it. There is  only one other thing makes me feel more like a woman and that is number four. 






4.  High Heel Shoes - Anyone and everyone that knows me knows my love for the high heel shoe.   I feel taller, more slender, more powerful and sexier in my high heel shoes.  There is no other explanation needed.  I love the person that invented them.  I can look at shoes like some people look at, well you know... cough cough.....

5.  Bubble Bath - What lady doesn't like a long bubble bath?  Have a drink in hand, feet propped up, pondering on the day's issues and planning tomorrow's escape.  I can sink in bubbles for hours, at least until the kids need something, then it is party over.

6. Pencil Skirt -  Now not all figures should attempt the pencil skirt and I am not saying that I am all that and a bag of chips or that I will be winning any of The Next Top Model episodes. But just as my make-up and high heels give me a little pep in my step, let me put on a pencil skirt and I will conquer the world.  I no longer fight the battle of my curves or try to hide them.  I will never be the size of a pencil so I embrace the next best thing.


7.  Laughter - Everyone laughs for different reasons, I laugh for a lot of reasons.  I am very thankful for my coping mechanism of laughter.  I think it is much better than crying especially since the crying can affect my number three. 

Now as I stated these are just a few things that I am thankful for and I really wouldn't want to have to go without them.  I have been without all seven of them and that is what makes me appreciate every single one of them.